


Scars

by Anonymous2



Category: The Beatles
Genre: Alternate Universe, Domestic Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sorry Pete
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-10-02 03:16:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10208249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymous2/pseuds/Anonymous2
Summary: Paul is trapped in a violent relationship.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first Beatles fanfic so please be nice lol. Have a great weekend !
> 
> Note: Anything italicized signifies a flashback.

 

* * *

 

 “He’ll have what I’m having.” Pete tells the waiter.

Paul opens his mouth to say something but closes it and settles for giving the waiter a nod and polite smile. He is a nervous wreck. He can’t remember the last time he had been around so many people.

“Quit staring at everyone, will you ?! ” Pete scoffs, snapping Paul out of his gaze “ This is why I never take you out.”

“Sorry…” Is the only word that manages to leave Paul’s lips as he lowers his eyes.

When the waiter returns with their meal they both eat in silence. It wasn’t always like this. As far as Paul could remember there was a time when he and Pete would actually laugh and talk and show affection towards each other; like a real couple.

_Things started to change after Paul left his hometown to go live with Pete in London a few years back. When the older man got laid off from his job about three months into them living together, he fell into a deep depression after weeks of no luck in finding a proper replacement. To make sure that they still had a roof over their heads and food in their stomachs , Paul worked two jobs. He even tried his best to give his partner as much emotional support as he thought was humanly possible but his support was, however, in vein. Pete only seemed to find comfort in alcohol. His drinking worsened as time went by and Paul was quick to realize how he was slowly  losing  the love of his life to the bottle. He had tried talking to the man about his excessive drinking but the other man just snapped at him in return._

_Paul decided to put an end to everything one day by pouring Pete’s liquor collection down the sink while he laid passed out on the couch._

 

_“Where is it ?!” Pete barked, pacing between the living room and kitchen of the small flat hours later._

_"I threw it away....”  Paul answered, emerging from the bedroom. “Look at what it’s doing to you !”_

_Pete turns to the other man. “All of it?” he questioned, not sure how much he wanted to hear the answer._

 " _Yes."_

  _Pete felt all the blood draining from his body as anger consumed him. “How could you ?!” he yelled, pushing some dishes that rested on the nearby counter to the floor. “Bloody hell,Paul! I spent the last of my earnings on that!”_

 " _Pete, it’s what was best for you.”_

_Pete chuckles but never says a word as he slowly  approaches the man standing opposite him. Paul’s heart started racing through his chest at the sight of how dark Pete’s eyes had become ._

_“Just calm down, ok?” Paul whispers “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just --” He continues, but is cut off when Pete suddenly pushes his back against the wall with his hand tightly wrapped around his throat._

  _Paul made several attempts to escape the other man’s grip but never succeeded.  “Pete....I can’t...breathe....” he pleads._

 " _Good.” Pete replied with a sardonic smile creeping up on his face._

_It pleased him to watch Paul suffer for a bit. Pete tightened his grip around the man’s throat with anger but only releases until he was seconds away from fainting. When Paul slouches over to catch his breath Pete used it as his opportunity to violently grab the other man by the hair and forcefully toss him to the floor like a rag doll before  repeatedly kicking him. The blows kept coming and Paul grew even weaker._

_“Bitch !” Pete spat, giving his last kick to the already broken man._

_Paul didn’t try moving. He was in too much pain to make any kind of movements. He was sure he had broken a few bones. Pete had never acted this way with him ; he was always gentle. This Pete was definitely not the man he fell in love with three years ago._

_The last Paul remembers is hearing a door slam and a sudden quietness. He passes out moments later on the floor -- afraid and alone._

 

__

* * *

_Paul wakes up the next morning in the comforts of his bed with soft pillows packed beneath his head. He tries to get out of bed but stopped in his tracks from the shooting pain that ran through his head and body._

 " _I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Pete said, entering the room with an ice-pack. “I called your boss this morning and told him you wouldn’t be able to come to work today.”_

_When Pete approaches him to place the ice-pack on his forehead, Paul flinched , afraid that he would hit him again. Pete sighed at how scared the man had appeared to be of him._

_“I’m really sorry for what I did to you last night.” He started . “It’s not like me to act that way. You know that, right ?”_

_Unable to come up with words, Paul settled for just nodding._

_“I’ll cut out the drinking if it makes you happy but you have to promise me something,”_

_“What is that?” Paul asked, pissed off at how much his voice cracked._

 " _I’ll stop drinking if you promise never to leave me. I can’t live without you, Paulie.”_

_Pete’s eyes were filled with tears as he waited patiently for Paul’s reply. It was hard to watch Pete breakdown in front of him. He had never seen this emotional side of the other man._

_“I won’t…”_

_As the months go by, Pete manages to get a job as a mechanic at a nearby  auto-repair shop but his excessive drinking doesn’t at all stop and neither does his violence toward Paul. Whenever Paul would attempt  to leave , Pete would become an emotional wreck and threaten to kill himself if he ever left. Falling for Pete’s threats, Paul would always stay._

 

                                                                                                         

* * *

“Paul… Paul McCartney from L.I.H, is that you ?” A vaguely familiar voice says, breaking the silence.

Paul looks up from his dinner plate and is shocked to see his old friend from high school, George Harrison, looking at him with a bright smile.

“George…oh my god !” Paul exclaimed, standing up to pull his friend into a warm embrace. “It’s so nice to see you!”

“Likewise ! How long has it been since we’ve last seen each other?”

Paul takes a while to think. “About six years.”

George’s mouth drops. “Already? Time sure flies.”

They both laugh but are interrupted by Pete clearing his throat. “Oh I almost forgot.” Paul smiles. “George this is my partner, Pete. Pete, this is my high school best friend, George.”

“Hey !” George greeted “ Nice to meet you.” He continues, extending his hand.

Pete remains seated and gives a slight nod, completely ignoring the man’s outstretched hand. “Paul we need to leave.” Is all he says.

Paul gives an inward sigh. “It was nice seeing you,George,”

“Same man. We need to see each other again and catch up on the ol’ days. How about my place Saturday, around 5 ?”

Paul doesn’t bother looking to Pete for approval. He didn’t want to have to say no to someone he hasn’t seen in years. “That sounds great ! We’ll be there.”

George lit up with excitement. He jots his address and number on a serviette and hands it to Paul before exchanging goodbyes.

 

                                                                                                             

* * *

As soon as they enter their apartment Pete yanks at Paul’s hair and pulls the younger man to himself, hissing into his face. “You knew it would piss me off and you still went ahead and said yes to that fucking guy without my permission.”

Paul’s mouth itches to defend his actions but he doesn’t bother. It was no use arguing with Pete because he never stops to listen.When Paul’s silence gets more than Pete could bare he knees him in the stomach causing him to fall to the floor in excruciating pain. Paul hated himself for being so weak and not fighting back. “I’m sorry” he whispers, wincing in anticipation of a slap.

Instead of slapping him, Pete makes his hand find its way back to Paul’s hair. “ Since you’re already on your knees,” he smirks “get to work.” he continues, pressing  Paul’s face to his crotch.

Paul inclines and unbuckles the other man’s pants with trembling fingers. His heart is racing as he pushes Pete’s boxers and pants to his ankles. Slowly he takes Pete’s cock to his mouth, hearing the man gasp at the sudden contact.

 “That’s right, suck my cock you dirty slut,” he groaned , tugging at the fist full of hair in his hand.

Paul begins sucking eagerly receiving yet another tug as an award. He was glad the older man had seemed to be enjoying it because that would mean that his punishment would either be lessen or that he completely would be let off the hook for the night. By the time Pete starts to near his orgasm he thrusts harder and faster, not giving Paul anytime to catch his breath.

 “I’m gonna come ! Ahh fuck...I’m gonna come!” he moans before coming hard into Paul’s mouth. The younger man swallows and hangs his head low in both guilt and embarrassment.

 "Get out of my sight!”

 Without another word Paul scurries away to the bathroom where he takes a lengthy shower and has a good cry. He had never felt more worthless in all his life.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anything italicized = flashback.

* * *

 

 

_When the bus pulled up to its stop, Paul was the first to get off.  He couldn’t contain his excitement, not today. The walk from the bus stop to his flat usually took about twenty minutes but Paul was able to make it in five._

_After storming through the door , he finds Pete sitting on the couch with a bottle of beer in his hand as he stares blankly at the telly._

_“What are you so happy about?” Pete asked, looking over his shoulder._

_Paul  takes his shoes off with his feet and then sits next to the other man before giving him a quick peck on the cheek. “Guess what happened today ?”_

_"You found some money ?”_

_"No !”_

_“You ran into Elvis on your way home?”_

_"No!”_

_"Bloody hell ! just tell me.” Pete exclaims, with a hint of annoyance in his voice._

_"Ok.”Paul takes a deep breath “ I got a promotion !”_

_Pete raised an eyebrow, not sharing half of Paul’s excitement. “Really...why?”_

_“Eppy said that everyone really like my ideas. They believe that my ideas could  make the company go far. I’ll get to have my own office now, could you believe it?”_

_Pete falls silent and reverts to watching the telly again, while casually taking a sip of his beer.“Who’d you have to fuck to get that?” He questioned after a long pause._

_Paul pulls away from the other man and looks at him with disgust “Excuse me ?”_

_The other man never replies._

_Paul’s shoulders sink. The happiness that he once held has completely slipped away._

_Pete gets up from the couch and picks up a stack of letters that laid on the coffee table.”While you were away, these came.” He says, throwing the letters at his boyfriend._

_Paul holds up one of the letters. The words “Return to sender” are written in bright blue ink. He picks up another one and it reads the same thing.  They were all letters he had sent to his father. The relationship between Paul and his father began to deteriorate after he brought Pete  home to meet the family.  James McCartney had no problem with his son being gay, it was just the man that he was with that James couldn’t stand. He couldn’t quite wrap his fingers around what it was about the young man that sent chills down his spine. He expressed his feelings to Paul and urged his son to leave the relationship before things got too serious but he never listened. After Paul announced that he would be moving to London to live with Pete, James begged him not to go. When Paul still decides to go ahead with his plans, he and James’ relationship almost instantly dwindled._

 

* * *

 

Pete is in a good mood today and Paul could tell because the older man spends most of the car ride talking . It , however, is not much of a conversation since Pete only spoke about things that interested him. Paul doesn’t mind though; he’s just happy Pete didn’t call off dinner at George’s place.

“Are you sure this is the place?” Pete asked, peering through the windshield to an isolated two-story home.

"Yeah, it is.” Paul said, glancing down at the address scribbled on the serviette.

They pull into the driveway and make their way up a few stairs leading to the front-door .Paul presses the doorbell and waits. He feels a slight hint of nervousness creeping up inside his stomach.

“You made it ! I was starting to get worried.” George greeted, “Come in !”

“Sorry, we were caught up in traffic.”

“It’s no problem, really.”  George said, leading the men into his living room.

A woman emerges from the kitchen not too long after they are seated and serves them beverages. George introduces her as his girlfriend, Pattie.

“So, what brings you to London ?” Paul asks when Pattie leaves.

“Job opportunities really. Liverpool is great and all but it didn’t have what I was looking for.” George answered. “How about you?”

“Pete and I wanted to be closer to each other.”

George is about to say something else but is cut off by the ringing of the doorbell. He excuses himself and briefly leaves the room. When he returns, Paul can’t help but stare in shock at the man that followed him. His mouth goes dry and his heart begins to flutter like crazy. The man was John. John Lennon.

John flashes a heartwarming smile and Paul gets up to greet him.

It isn’t until he and John hug each other that Paul realizes how much he missed the other man and his life back home. Paul melts into the embrace and inhales the man’s familiar and somewhat relaxing scent.

John dropped everything he was doing when George called him a few hours back to tell him that Paul would be over. Paul and his family had moved after graduation and John hadn’t seen him back since. He hugs the man even tighter as he thinks about the six years they’ve lost together.

“I’ve missed you,” John murmurs.

“Me too,” Paul whispers before gently pulling away. He could feel Pete’s burning eyes on him.

 

* * *

 

“What have you been up to ,John?” Paul asked, helping himself to some stuffed mushrooms.

“Well, I’m working on getting my masters degree in Music Education. I’m also a part-time music teacher at a high school here in London.”

Paul smiles. “Impressive!”

“Could you imagine the same John that skipped school for days is a teacher now ?”  George jokes.

“I wasn’t that bad.” John responds.

“Yes, you were.”

John playfully rolls his eyes “What about you, Macca? What are you doing now?”

Paul shrugs. “Nothing in particular. I left my job about a year ago.”

“Why?”

“Because he loves me.” Pete intervenes with a smile.

The tone in Pete’s voice doesn’t go unnoticed by John.

                                                        

* * *

 

The rest of dinner goes rather well, mostly because of George cracking jokes and bringing up embarrassing stories from high school. Pete pours himself several glasses of alcoholic wine in a matter of minutes as he drowns out George’s talking. He focuses his attention on what he believed to be  flirtatious glances between Paul and John. They had been looking at each other all night. Pete could feel his blood boiling.

“How long have you and Paul been  together, Pete?” Pattie asks, realising how quiet the man was.

Pete snaps from his train of thought. “Three years.” he replies as he wraps his arm around Paul possessively.

“Must have been really hard to pursue Paul, ugh?”

“Not really.” Pete starts. “ Why don’t you tell ‘em , Paul. Why don’t you tell  them how you were in my bed begging me to fuck you the same night we met? he says nudging his boyfriend.

An awkward and deafening silence falls over the room.

“Pete, please don’t do this…” Paul whispers in a pleading voice.

“No Paul, let’s talk.” Pete continues mercilessly. “Let’s tell your friends how you practically threw yourself at me.”

Paul flinches and lowers his head in shame. Everyone stares at Pete in utmost shock.

“You guys are his friends,right?” The man continues “You of all people should know how much of  a slut he is.”

John watches as a tear escapes behind Paul’s eyelashes and is quickly wiped away.

“Sorry.” Paul says before running out the room.

“Excuse me.” Pete smiles and goes after his partner.

“Yikes…” George whispers,taking an unusually large sip of wine.

“I’m so sorry. I didn’t know my question would cause such a problem.” Pattie admits . “I feel so bad.”

“It’s alright dear. I don’t think anyone could have predicted that outcome.”

“That guy’s a bloody wanker !” John exclaims.

George and Pattie nod in agreeance. When they all fall silent again, they hear muffled voices coming from the kitchen. Pete’s voice raises and Paul says something. The next thing everyone hears is a distinct slap.

John jumps to his feet but is quickly pulled back down by George. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“He slapped Macca. I heard it with me own ears. You heard it too !”

“John listen, we’re not in high school, Paul doesn’t need you to fight his battles anymore.He’s a grown man. He can handle himself.”

“He obviously can’t defend himself. If he could, he would.” John cries.

“John cut it out, ok?” George snaps. “It’s not our place to intervene.”

 

                                                         

* * *

 

_Paul sped up his walking. They were following him again._

_“Hey you !” One of them called._

_When Paul looked back , he saw the same two guys from school that had been making his life a living hell. They were only a few steps away from him. He regretted not walking home with George._

_“We just want to talk to ya, mate !”_

_Paul had hoped  someone would pass by and maybe make the boys turn around. As their footsteps drew nearer and near, Paul began to run. The boys ran after him for about two blocks before finally getting a hold of him._

_“Please don’t hurt me!” Paul begged as the boys backed him into a nearby alley._

_“Shut up ya bloody queer!”_

_“What do you think  we should do with him, Adam?” The shortest of the two asked._

_“Oh, I don’t know. Let’s see what Mr. K thinks.” Adam replied, pulling a small knife from his pocket._

_Paul felt his knees go weak. “Please…” he pleaded, holding back the tears._

_“Are you scared princess ?” Adam taunted._

_Paul  quickly tried to make an escape but is caught  in no time._

_“You shouldn’t have done that!” Adam scoffed, bracing the other boy’s back against the wall. “You’ve just made everything worse.” he continued, pressing the knife to the other’s throat._

_Paul closed his eyes,forcing the tears to stream down his face.His life flashed before him as he anxiously waited to feel the sharp blade cut through his skin. He never felt anything , however.  All he remembers is suddenly feeling a weight lifted off of him and the blade of the knife moving from his throat._

_When he opened his eyes, he saw Adam laying on the ground and an angry John standing over him with a broken bottle in his hand. Paul assumed the other bully had ran away._

_“Thank you,” he said shakingly._

_“Are you alright ?” John asked, patting his friend’s shoulder._

_“I- I think so.”_

_“Come on. Let’s get you home.”_

 

_Paul didn’t know what he would do without John._

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello darlings! I hope all is well. Thank you for your kudos and comments, they are greatly appreciated and is what really keeps me going on this story.
> 
> Note: Anything italicized = flashback.

 

* * *

 

John looks down at the plate of dessert that sat before him. He was sure it would be delicious but he was in no mood to eat anything, not after what had just happened. George still tries to keep up conversation and make jokes to lighten up the mood but nothing changes. Pete is the only one that  replies to George. Pattie keeps to herself for the most part.

“Where’s the bathroom?”

"Down the hall, to your left.” George directs.

John nods and then leaves the room knowing fully well that  he doesn’t really need to use the bathroom. Since Paul hadn’t return with Pete, John just had to check on him. When he reaches the kitchen, he sees his friend sitting at the breakfast table with his face buried in his palms.

“Hey?”  he whispers, sitting next to the younger man.

Paul jumps back frightened and John  sees his face wet from tears. “I’ll join you guys in a second.” he says with a forced smile.

“You’re crying,”

“No,” Paul replies, quickly wiping away his tears. “I’m not.”

“I’m not blind, Macca” John says pointedly “Does he always treat you this way?”

 Paul hides his face again out of humiliation.

“Paul…” John says gently  

 “He’s never acted this way before … in public.”

 “So he does this when you guys are alone?!” John blurts out .

  _“Worst”._ Paul wants to say but instead hides his still red cheek with his hand when he remembers that John would probably be able to see it.

 “He hits you too, doesn’t he?”

 The younger man’s tears come quicker than he could wipe them away. He tries to control himself but his built up emotions were too much to handle.

 John takes his friend’s silence as a yes. “How long has this been going on?” he almost screams. “Does your family know about this?”

 Paul shakes his head _no ._ “My father hasn’t spoken to me since I moved in with Pete.”

 John sighs. “What about Mike ?”

 Paul takes a deep breath. “Mike came to visit me about two years ago and he and Pete got into a really big argument. I should have taken his side but I took Pete’s instead. I don’t think Mike could ever forgive me for that.” he explains “ I haven’t seen or heard from him after that day.”

 “Jesus Macca, that’s awful !” John exclaims before pulling the other man closer.

 Paul leans his head on his friend's shoulder and begins to sob uncontrollably as all the awful memories from the past 3 years come rushing back to him.

“He made you leave your job too, didn’t he?”

Paul nods and after a long pause replies. “He was convinced that I was sleeping with my co-workers.”

John grits his teeth and holds his friend tighter.

“Is everything alright? I thought I heard some shouting.” Pete says out of the blue and Paul jumps back with fear.

“You bastard !” John spat, springing to his feet.

“Is everything alright mate ?” Pete asks with a taunting smirk. “ You seem a little tense.”

“Don’t play dumb with me you fucking twat !” John hisses, grabbing Pete by the collar.

The man freezes up from John’s sudden move. He looks over to Paul , who is standing opposite him with tears streaming down his face by now.

John violently chucks Pete to a nearby counter, causing  him to hit his head against the cupboard.

“Get your fucking hands off me !”

“What are you going to do if I don’t?”  John sneers, pulling the other man’s collar much tighter.

 Pete begins to struggle for breath. With both anger and panic starting to take over him, he makes several attempts to get John’s hands from his throat but the man only tightens his grip in return. Desperate, he thinks quickly and sucker punches the man with his free hand. John stumbles back a bit and holds his jaw in shock. Pete watches on with satisfaction. His glory doesn’t last for too long,however, because John attacks him again and before he knows it they are on the floor wrestling and throwing punches at each other.

“Stop it ! Stop it  !” George yells, pulling John off Pete.

Pattie rushes to Pete’s side and tries to hold him back.  “Paul, get your fucking things ! we’re leaving!” He bellows with anger.

“That’s right, run away !” John taunts, trying to break free from George’s hold.

Pete doesn’t reply, he instead walks over to a dumbfounded Paul and grabs him by the arm with extreme force. “Didn’t you fucking hear me?” he scoffed.

“Macca, don’t walk out that door with him!” John cried.

Paul looks into John’s eyes and sees the same pain that he saw in his father and Mike’s eyes when he walked away from them.

Pete grips Paul and drags him out the kitchen. His heart is racing through his chest as Pete yanks his coat off the rack and leads him through the front door. He hears footsteps behind them but he’s too afraid to look back.

“Paul, don’t go !” John pleads, trying to catch up with the two.

Pete quickly forces the younger man into the front seat of his car and slams the door before getting in himself. Paul looks through the window and sees John standing on the lawn,obviously upset and George comforting him.

He did it again. He chose Pete over everyone else.

 

* * *

_Paul was about to fall asleep when he heard a few loud taps on his window. He rolled out of bed and opened the casement, causing John to fall in._

_“What are you doing here this hour of the night?”_

 " _I couldn’t sleep.” John said, lazily throwing himself unto Paul’s bed._

 " _Did you and Mimi have another fight?” Paul asked,sitting next to his friend._

  _John shakes his head. “It’s Barbra…” he murmured ._

  _“What happened ?”_

  _John stayed silent for a moment , his lips quivering and his eyes burning with tears._

_"She broke up with me.”_

_Paul sighed and scooted closer to the older boy before pulling him into a warm hug._

" _She called me a mediocre bass player Paul, could you believe it?”_

_Paul pressed his lips together, trying not to laugh. “It's alright.” he comforted, patting John’s back. “I think you’re a great bass player.”_

_John looked up and smiled weakly. “You really think so?”_

 " _I know so.”_

_John let out another sob. “ I just -- I just thought we would be together forever.”_

_“I understand. Everything is going to be fine, John. She didn’t deserve you anyway.”_

_They sat in peaceful silence for a while but when Paul reached out to wipe John’s tears away, John caught his wrist and pulled him closer.  His breath hitched as he stared into the other boy’s eyes confused._

_“What are you --”  Paul started but was cut off by John pressing their lips together._

_Paul froze and John eventually pulled away. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have. I don’t know what came over me.”  he said with an awkward laugh._

_A few moments pass and Paul doesn’t say anything. John kept his eyes on the younger as he waited for him to speak like a criminal waited to hear their verdict. A million thoughts ran through his head in their silence. Did he just mess up their friendship?_

  _"I'll just leave.”_

 " _No, don’t.”  Paul whispered before locking their lips together again._

  _John tilted his head and gently bit at the younger boy’s lower lip. Paul broke away from the kiss and positioned himself on the other’s lap, moaning softly against his lips and running his fingers through the boy’s soft hair._

_John felt his already tight trousers  getting even tighter with his growing erection. His mind told him to stop but his body said something else. He was no queer. He was only attracted to birds . But Paul was an exception, of course. There always was something in Paul that made John question his sexuality. He thought that it may be was  Paul’s beauty and softness that caused him to be so enchanting. Even though he hated to admit it, he would often times have thoughts of pinning the younger boy beneath him and shagging the living day light out of him._

  _John sucked the air through his teeth when he felt Paul unbutton his pants and massage his throbbing cock._

_“You like that?”  Paul smiled seductively._

_John eagerly shook his head . The thought of how desperate he must have looked to his best-friend caused his face to burn red with embarrassment._

_Paul slipped his fingers under the waist of John’s trousers and glided them off, revealing how painfully hard he was. Paul slowly worked his tongue around the hard flesh, ignoring the urge he felt to touch himself._

  _John’s breath hitched again at the contact of Paul’s warm and wet mouth on his cock.His mind was definitely off Barbra by then._

  _“Feels… so good.” he praised._

_He gripped Paul’s hair and moaned out loud, not really caring that Mike was in the next room and could probably hear them. The younger boy teased John for a few minutes and then eventually  takes him into his mouth.His toes began to curl and his vision started to get a bit hazy when he felt himself nearing his orgasm._

 " _I-I’m gonna....come.”_

_The younger began to suck on him even harder and faster causing shock waves to run down John’s spine as he loudly reached his climax._

_They both laid back trying to catch their breaths for a few minutes._

_“Make sure you keep it down the next time, will ya?” Paul joked “My dad would kill us if he found out what we were doing in his house.”_

  _John laughed .“Thank you.” he whispered after a long pause “What about you ? Do you want me to -”_

  _“No,” Paul said, “Don’t worry about me.”_

 " _Are you sure. If you want , I could.”_

  _Paul turned and looked at his friend for a moment. “I’m fine, really.”_

  _They fall silent again ._

  _“Macca, can I ask you something?”_

  _“Yeah.”_

  _“This doesn’t make me queer, does it?”_

  _“No, it doesn’t.”_

  _“I mean, I’m almost seventeen and you knew you were queer since you were a kid.” John continued. “So I would know if I were queer long before, right?”_

  _“I guess.”_

  
_John smiled and looked up at the ceiling feeling a sense of relief. He falls into a slumber not too long after but Paul doesn’t sleep until morning._

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello darlings! I wanted to post this chapter earlier but I was so busy with work that I didn't get the chance. Anyway, thank you for your comments and kudos <3 ! Have a great weekend.
> 
> Anything italicized = flashback

* * *

 

Paul looks into the bathroom mirror as his trembling fingers make their way to his black eye. They weren’t even halfway through the door of their flat when Pete started to viciously attack him. It was by sheer luck that he managed to escape the older man’s grip and lock himself in the bathroom. The dinner was a mistake. Why did he have to say yes to George and why did George have to invite John?  

His heart almost leaves his chest when Pete starts violently kicking at the door. He watches on in horror as the door vibrates with the man’s force. It goes on for a few minutes and with every one of Pete’s attempts, Paul grows even more petrified. The door weakens under pressure and eventually, flies open and hits the wall next to it, leaving a dent.Pete angrily storms into the small space and with a swift movement connects his fist to the younger man’s jaw causing him to stumble back and whimper in pain.

“The next time you run away from me, it's gonna be worse. Do you understand?”

Paul swallows hard and shakes his head. Pete gives him another blow to the face and yells at him to properly answer his question. When Paul does, he punches him again- this time in the stomach. The blows come quicker than Paul could think of which part of his body he should hide next.  

The last time he got Pete this angry, he ended up in the hospital with a broken arm and several fractured ribs. He followed along with the older man’s orders and told the doctors that he fell down a flight of stairs. It's a memory he always tries to push to the back of his mind, until now.

He fears he might end up in the E.R again when he falls to the floor with exhaustion and excruciating pain. Everything that happened after that goes blank.

 

                                                                                                    ***

When Paul finally comes to consciousness, he realizes that he is laying on their bed completely naked and with his hands tied above his head to the bedpost. He attempts to wriggle his wrist from the rope but quickly stops when the door creaks and Pete enters. He quietly walks over to the bed and tightens the rope causing the younger to wince.

“Hurts?”

“Y-y-yes.”

“Good.” Pete answers.

Paul looks at him for a brief moment. He has a multitude of purplish bruises lingering on his cheekbones and forehead and small cuts that ran along his nose bridge and lips.

“I’m sorry.” he whispers, feeling a strong sense of guilt.

Pete chuckles and gets into the bed, positioning himself between Paul’s legs. “No, you’re not. You enjoyed seeing me get hurt tonight.”

“No, I didn’t. I swear.”

“Then why didn’t you at all try to help?”

“I...”

“That’s what I thought. I’m going to teach you a lesson. One you will never forget.” Pete says before taking his trousers off.

Without warning, Pete forcefully penetrates  himself into the younger man’s entrance. He fucks him with slow and painful thrust, ignoring the sobs and pleads for him to stop. The more Paul implores the more Pete increases his pace, making sure the other man doesn’t get an ounce of pleasure.

“Slut.” he pants “Thought about cheating on me with that bloody John, didn’t ya?” he continues, back-handing the younger.

Paul cries out in agony and shakes his head frantically, praying for everything to be over.

“Answer me !” he slaps him again.

“N-no.”

“If you have thoughts of cheating or ever cheat on me, I swear to God, I will kill you,”  Pete warns, slamming into the other to make his point clear. “If I can’t have you, no one will. Understand?”

“Yes,” Paul says, choking back a sob.

Just when he thought it would never be over, Pete thrusts one last time and comes inside him. He pulls out and gets dressed again before heading for the door.

“Pete,” Paul murmurs, tears filling his eyes again. “You forgot to untie me.”

“No, I didn’t. I’m not done with you yet,” he smiles sinisterly then leaves.

The older man occasionally comes back into the room and fucks Paul for the remainder of the night. The pain is much worse than the pain he felt when Pete broke his arm a few months back. He wishes tonight never happened.

 

 

* * *

 

_“Mr.McCartney?”_

_Paul looks up from the paperwork that laid scattered on his desk and smiles at the woman that stood in the doorway of his new office. “Please, call me Paul. Mr. McCartney’s my father.”_

_Betty giggles and apologizes. “There is a man by the name of Pete Best waiting to see you out in the hallway. He says that he needs to talk to you about something urgent.”_

_Paul sighs inwardly. “Thank you, Betty.”_

_"Welcome.”_

_Paul sits back and finishes off what he was doing. He makes the man wait a few minutes before getting up and going out into the waiting room to meet him._

_Pete smiles gratefully and pulls the younger man into a warm hug. Paul freezes up as the smell of cigarette smoke mixed with alcohol and cheap cologne burn his nostrils. He instantaneously pushes the man away and looks around to see if anyone saw them. Thankfully no one was around._

_“What the hell are you doing showing up at my job?” he questions, sotto voce._

_"Where have you been staying ?”_

_“At a friend’s,” Paul replies, crossing his arms._

_“I’ve been trying to contact you for the longest while.”_

_“Well, hasn’t it occurred to you that maybe I do not want to be contacted?”_

_“Please,  just come back home. ”_

_Paul takes his time and studies the other man. “Pete, I can't just come back to you after all you’ve done. You cheated on me not once but twice and in three months,” he whispers, the hurt still evident in his voice._

_“I know and I’m sorry. I really fucked up, ok?” Pete starts. “Those guys meant nothing to me. With them, it was just sex, no love. But I love you, Paul and only you.”_

_Paul titters. “People use the word ‘love’ a little too loose these days.”_

_"Please forgive me. I’ll never do it again, I promise. ”_

_Paul unfolds his arms and inhales deeply._

_“I’ll come back when I feel like it’s the right time.”_

_“How soon will that be?”_

_“I don’t know,” He duly notes. “I have to get back to work.” he adds and then walks away._

_Paul goes back home two days after. Things go well for the first few weeks until he one day walks in on Pete with another man.  The cycle never stops._

 

* * *

 

When Paul wakes up the next morning Pete unties him and runs a bath for him. He sits in the tub and allows the warm and soothing water to wash over his aching muscles. It’s nice to be able to finally relax after a night of no sleep and torture. His mind runs on John. He probably wants nothing more to do with him after last night. He hated having to walk away from the other man but he knew that it was probably best for everyone. John seems to be doing well for himself and Paul knows that if he enters his life right now he would be nothing more than a toxic burden.

After a few minutes, he shakes the train of thought away, steps out the bathtub and gets dressed. When he walks into the kitchen, Pete is already seated at the table with breakfast.

“I made your favorite, scrambled eggs.”

Paul wants to tell him that he likes his eggs hard- boiled instead of scrambled but he is too hungry to bother. He pulls up a chair and smiles weakly before he starts to eat.

“I love you, you know that, right?” Pete blurts out, resting his hand on Paul’s sore wrist.

“Yeah... I do.”

“You just really make me so angry sometimes and I tend to lose control.”

Paul lightly nods his head as he playfully pushes the beans around his plate.

“I have to leave now,”  Pete says, getting up from the table.

“Where are you going?”

“I umm… I have to meet a friend. I don’t know what time I will be back.”

Paul already knows the other man is running off to see one of his little sex buddies but he pretends to believe the lie.

“Ok.”

Pete kisses the younger man’s forehead and then storms off.

                                                                                                           ***

Paul jumps out of his slumber, drenched in sweat when he hears a loud pounding on the front door. Pete must have forgotten his keys. God, how long had he been sleeping? Pete would kill him if he was standing outside the door for too long. He quickly springs off the bed and runs to the door. He is about to open the lock but stops in his tracks when he hears a familiar voice.

“Paul, open the door. It's me...John.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello darlings ! Your feedback last chapter was amazing and greatly appreciated. Thank you guys once again for your encouragement and kudos !!! 
> 
> Have a great week !

 

* * *

 

Paul backs away from the door and looks at it as if rats and roaches were crawling out of it.

 

“Open the door. It’s me...John.”

 

Paul backs away even farther and absentmindedly begins to pace the floor. George must have given John his address last night. He shudders at the thought of Pete coming home right now and finding John standing outside his door.

 

“Macca, are you there?”

 

Paul wishes he were still tied to the bedpost because if he were he wouldn’t  have to worry about making a decision that could probably lead to dire consequences.

John’s  knocks are persistent and every one seems to be louder than the one before it. After a few minutes, Paul takes a deep breath and opens the door, despite the fact that his heart is pounding violently against his chest.

 

“Thank heavens you’re alright !”

 

John wraps Paul into a warm hug, but his happiness quickly fades when the other man stiffens. It isn’t until he pulls away that he sees the cuts and bruises on the younger’s face and neck. Paul flashes a forced smile at him while simultaneously trying to cover up the contusions on his wrist with his sleeves.

 

“Why are you here?”

 

“I was worried about you and I have every right to be from the looks of it.”

 

“John, I’m fine.” Paul assures with a hoarse voice.

 

“No, you’re not _fine,_ Macca. You’re far from it as a matter of fact.”  John argues “Where is that bastard anyway?”

 

“He isn’t home.”

 

“Good. We need to talk.” John says brushing past the other man and making his way into the living room.

 

Paul sighs and closes the door before wordlessly following behind his friend.

 

“What Pete’s doing to you isn’t right ,Macca. Why are you allowing him to treat you this way?”  

 

Paul looks down.“He isn’t always like this. I just make him angry sometimes.” He replies after a long pause.

 

“You making him angry doesn’t justify him putting his hands on you.” John says, trying to sound as calm as possible. “You deserve better.”

 

“He loves me it’s just that...”  Paul trails off and nervously begins to tap his feet under John’s watchful eyes.“I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” he whispers.

 

John nods even though he wants to carry on the conversation. He knows that getting the younger man to open up wouldn’t be an easy task so he decides to take things slow. Quietly, he grabs the remote from the coffee table and turns on the telly. Nothing is said after that moment and Paul is grateful.

 

                                                        

* * *

 

_“John, your friend is here !” Mimi calls from the kitchen._

 

_John almost instantly drops the book he was reading and runs down the stairs. Mimi yells something at him about running in the house but he quickly brushes her off and rushes into the living room where his friend sits._

 

_“Well, you’re in a good mood,” Paul comments._

 

_“Of course I am, it’s my birthday, remember ?”_

 

_“How can I forget ? You’ve been talking about this day for the past week.”_

 

_They both laugh ._

 

_“Well, did you get me anything?” John bluntly asks._

 

_“I did but you have to close your eyes first,”_

 

_John whines at first and expresses how much he hates surprises but Paul somehow convinces him to close his eyes anyway As far as John is concerned, Paul is the only person that could persuade him to do anything._

 

_“Ok, you can look !”_

 

_John opens his eyes and they almost fall out of  their socket. “For me?” Are the only words that manage to leave his lips as he gazes at the brand new bass guitar Paul holds in his hand. After Mimi had sold his guitar a few months back as punishment for his slipping grades, John had lost all hope of getting another one anytime soon._

 

_“Yes, it’s for you silly.”_

 

_John carefully collects the bass  from his friend and gives him a quick hug._

 

_“How many newspapers did you have to deliver to afford this?”_

 

_“Alot!” The younger stressed. “Mimi said that she will let you keep this one only if you promise to up your grades.”_

 

_John rolls his eyes and Paul laughs.  They spend the rest of the afternoon singing and playing mostly Chuck Berry and Elvis Presley songs._

_When the doorbell rings a few hours later they are both sitting on the couch watching telly. John gets up to answer it and Paul follows after him._

 

_“B-Barbara?” The older boy stutters when he opens the door._

 

_“I know, I’m the last person you were expecting,” The girl smiles. “but happy birthday!” she says handing him a small gift ._

 

_John lights up and takes the teenaged girl’s hand into his and leads her to the living room, leaving Paul behind. When he walks back into the room, John has his arm wrapped around Barbara and is wiping her tears away as she talks. He already assumes they’re  discussing the break-up from a couple months ago._

 

_“I’m gonna go see if Mimi needs help.” He says._

 

_When neither John nor Barbara look up to acknowledge what was said, Paul takes it as his cue to leave._

_Mimi puts the finishing touches on the cake and Paul helps wash the dishes. His mind isn’t in the right place. The naive thought that he once held of him and John becoming anything more than friends has completely been shattered with Barbara’s return. His vision goes blurry as tears begin to well up in his eyes. He washes the last plate and attempts to put it in the dish-holder when it slips from his fingers and falls to the floor with a loud smash ._

_Mimi snaps her head up and looks at Paul with wide eyes. Afraid she would yell at him, he quickly apologizes._

 

_“It’s alright dear. I’ll get the broom.”_

 

_Paul sighs and begins to pick up the broken pieces. There goes his fantasy._

 

* * *

 

They’ve been sitting in silence for the past hour. The t.v. is still on but John isn’t paying much attention because he’s too busy glancing over at the younger man that sits a few inches away from him. He isn’t sure which feeling is stronger -- his hatred towards Pete or the guilt that pierced through him. May be if he had searched for Paul years ago none of this would have happened.

 

“You don’t have to do this, you know.” Paul blurts out.

 

John turns to the other man and gives him a confused look. “Do what?”

 

“Be here...with me.”

 

“Macca, we’ve already lost six years. I wouldn’t dare do anything to lose you again.”

 

“I just -- I don’t want to be a burden to you.”

 

“You will never be a burden. Trust me.”

 

Paul feels his breath hitch when John intertwines their fingers and gives him a heartwarming smile. He returns the smile soon after and focuses his attention back to the telly.

 

***

 

They’re halfway through the movie when Paul jolts to his feet with panic. “Did you hear that?”

 

John raises an eyebrow. “Hear what?” he whispers.

 

“Shh,”

 

It isn’t until they fall silent again that John begins to hear the jingling of keys.

 

“Oh God, Pete’s home.” Paul trembles.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Easter darlings ! The wait is finally over !!! Thank you guys once again for your amazing support ❤ ❤ ❤ !

 

* * *

 

“What do you mean you’re not leaving?” Paul asks with wide eyes.

“I’m not leaving you here with that fucking psychopath!”  

“I’ll be fine.”

“Pa-”

“John, please!” Paul pleads, his knees buckling with fear. “Don’t make this like last night.”

John sighs and looks at the way his friend trembles. Not for one second did he think about Paul when he attacked Pete last night. He didn’t think about how his actions would affect the other man. He’s sure his selfishness is the reason for Paul’s bruises.

“Are you sure, Macca?” John asks. “You can leave with me,”

“No, I’ll be ok. I promise.”

John sighs again and pulls Paul into a hug before forcing his way out the window leading to the fire escape. “I’ll come back tomorrow.” He says before running down the long metal stairs with regret coursing through his veins.

***

“Hey !” Paul greets when the door swings open. 

“Is lunch ready ?” Pete growls.

“I umm… I was just about to start,”

“Good because I’m starved,” Pete says, lazily throwing himself on the couch. “Make it quick.”

Paul nods and scurries into the kitchen. His hands are still shaking like crazy and his heart is pounding so loud that he could hear it in his ears. He takes a deep breath and manages to get himself together after a few minutes. However, when the other man walks into the room not too long after Paul begins to feel his nervousness kick in again.

“What’d you do while I was away?” Pete questions, wrapping his arms around the younger’s waist.

“Nothing. Just watched telly.”

“Are you sure that’s all?”

“Yeah,”

“Are you sure no one was here when I was gone?”

Paul swallows hard. “N-no,”

“You know I hate it when you lie to me !” Pete spat, roughly turning the other man around to face him.

“I- I’m not.”

“Then why are there two empty cups on the coffee table ?”

Paul feels the blood drain from his body when he remembers that he made tea for John and himself earlier.

“Answer me !” Pete snaps before striking the younger man.

Paul whimpers and holds his now red cheek. “They both belong to me. I was in the living room most of the day.”

Pete grits his teeth and narrows his eyes. “You better not be lying to me !”

Paul shakes his head frantically and Pete walks away.

* * *

 

 

_ Paul throws his favorite sweater into the small suitcase and closes it. He’s preparing to head back to Liverpool for his aunt’s funeral. One of his cousins called him a few days ago and told him that the woman had passed away. Paul was devastated.  _

_ “Where do you think you’re going ?” Pete questions, leaning in the doorway. _

_ “I’m going back home for aunt Shirley’s funeral.” _

_ “No, you’re not.” _

_ Paul snaps his head up and looks at the other man to see if he were making some kind of sick joke but the look in the man’s eyes showed no sign of a jest. _

_ “I already told you, you’re not going back to Liverpool.” _

_ “Pete, my aunt is dead. I haven’t seen her in three years; the least I could do is pay my respects to her.” _

_ “I don’t care. You’re not going.” _

_ “Pe-” _

_ “I said no!” Pete barks. “If you go back there your bloody father and brother are going to convince you not to come back here. You know how much they hate me.” _

_ “I’ll come back, I promise.” _

_ “You’re still not going.” _

_ “Pete, you can’t do this!” _

_ “Yes, I can, and I am.” _

_ Paul grabs his suitcase from the bed and storms out the room, almost knocking Pete off his feet. _

_ Pete follows after the younger man with a fit of rage and tosses him to the floor before repeatedly punching and kicking him for several agonizing minutes. _

_ “You’re not going and that’s final !” _

_ Paul curls himself into a fetal position when the blows end and sobs uncontrollably. He has never felt more powerless. _

* * *

The next morning Paul is sitting in the kitchen reading the newspaper when a sudden knock on the door shatters the peaceful silence. Quickly he sets the newspaper on the table and jumps to his feet. When he looks through the peephole and sees John he hesitates for a moment. He knows the odds of Pete coming home from work anytime soon is slim but he still remains skeptical.

He sighs and opens the door anyway because he is sure that John would keep coming back until he answers.The older man greets him with a hug and brushes past him. 

When John walks into the living room he slumps down on the couch as if it's his own and pats it, inviting Paul to sit next to him. The younger man sits on the other end and looks at him warily.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Paul murmurs. “Why?”

“I dunno. You just seem a little tense.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? That bastard didn’t do anything to you, did he?”

“No, he didn’t.”

John nods and studies the other man. He's changed so much. He’s not the same jovial Paul that John once knew and loved. He’s now completely dejected.

“Can I get you anything to drink?” Paul asks after a moment of silence.

“No, I’m quite alright, thanks.”

“Are you hungry? I can get you something.”

“I’m fine, Macca.” John insists. “So tell me, how do you spend your days? Are you always home?”

“ I hardly ever go out,” Paul says, looking a bit embarrassed.

“You still play the guitar ?”

“Not really. I only play sometimes. What about you ?”

“I play almost every day.” John says  “Would you believe I still have the guitar you bought for me birthday?”

For the first time all morning, Paul’s lips curve into a smile.

* * *

_ "I’m getting tired of seeing you, Lennon.” Principal Martin says, looking at the teenaged boy that sat opposite him. _

_ “The feelings mutual.” John mumbles. _

_ “What did you say ?” _

_ “Nothing.” The boy smiles sardonically, taking a puff on his cigarette. _

_ “No smoking in my office !” Mr.Martin exclaims, slamming his fist on the desk. _

_ John chuckles and outs the fag before tossing it into the small mesh bin that sat nearby. “Happy?” _

_ Martin narrows his eyes and is about to say something but is cut off by the secretary bursting into the room. _

_ “The new student is here.” _

_ “Thank you, Susan. Send him in please.” _

_ A few seconds later the woman appears with a teenaged boy following behind her. _

_ “Hello, Paul.”Mr.Martin greets “We’re very happy to have you here with us.” _

_ Paul smiles nervously. _

_ “John, here is one of our students. He will be happy to show you around the school, wouldn’t he?” _

_ “It’s not like I have a choice anyway,” John grumbles before getting up. _

_ “Come straight back to my office when you are done, Lennon.” _

_ John sighs and leads Paul out the office. He takes his time and shows the other boy around campus to prolong going back to Principal Martin’s office. _

_ “Who’s better, Buddy Holly or Jerry Lee Lewis?” John suddenly asks as they walk through the corridor. _

_ “Buddy Holly of course.” _

_ John grins from ear to ear and pats  Paul’s back. “You and I are going to make great friends son, I could tell.” _

* * *

The next couple of hours goes by too fast for John’s liking even though not much is said between him and Paul. He doesn’t mind the silence though.He knows it’ll take time for the other man to come around and eventually open up to him.

“Take care of yourself, Macca,” John says as they approach the door.

“I will,”

“I’ll come back tomorrow.”

Paul nods and John leaves after they exchange goodbyes.

 

Paul doesn’t know why but when he closes the door a small smile creeps up on his face and it manages to stay there for the rest of the day.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello darlings ! I know, I’m terrible for posting so late but I had some really important issues to attend to. Anyway, I hope you guys are having a wonderful weekend. Thanks once again for all your comments and kudos. You guys are the best ! ❤

* * *

 

John’s daily visits have become Paul’s favorite part of the day. He comes almost every day and they would watch whatever was showing on t.v. or just talk. Well, John does most of the talking, Paul just listens.

“Let’s go somewhere,” John suggests, midway through the movie they were watching. “There is a really great restaurant a few blocks from here.”

Paul’s head jolts up and he stares at the other man with wide eyes. “I can’t,”

“Why not?”

“Because… Pete doesn’t like it when I go anywhere without his permission.”

The fact that he whispers it doesn’t make it sound any less humiliating.

“He doesn’t have to know, does he?”

“What if he finds out?”

“He’s not going to find out anything.”John assures  “He’s not a bloody god,”

Paul isn’t so sure about John’s last statement.

“Alright, forget about the restaurant. We’ll just go to my place. What’d ya say?”

“I don’t know…”

“You can’t stay cooped up in this place for the rest of your life.” John starts “Everything will be fine, Macca. Trust me.”

“...ok,”

John brightens up almost immediately and jumps to his feet. “Let’s go!”

Paul takes a deep breath and follows behind the other man, his heart beating violently against his chest. He hasn’t gone anywhere without Pete by his side in almost two years. He feels like a fish out of water. Absentmindedly, he draws closer to John, hoping for some kind of comfort.

John squeezes his hand and flashes a quick smile. “You’ll be fine.”

* * *

 

Paul shifts uneasily in his seat as he looks around the unfamiliar room. His muscles are still cramped up with tension and his heart is still throbbing like crazy. He really doesn’t know what to do with himself; especially after John left to go make something for the both of them to eat. He offers help but John insists that he just relaxes and let him do the work.

After a few minutes, he eventually gets up and wanders around the room. He stops in front of a large picture frame that laid on the wall with gold and black decorating its edges. In it is a picture of John and a few other people gathered around Rock ‘n’ Roll legend, Chuck Berry. He smiles when he sees the frozen excitement in John’s  face.

“John?” Paul calls from the living room.

“Yeah?”

“You didn’t tell me you got to meet Chuck Berry,”

“It must have slipped my mind !”

“What’d you say to him ?”

“Fire !” John shouts after a long pause.

Paul raises an eyebrow. “What?”

“Fire !”

It isn’t until John yells the second time that Paul begins to smell and see the smoke coming from the kitchen. By the time he gets there he sees the other man frantically trying to out the fire on the stove top with a hand towel.

Quickly, Paul rushes over to the sink and fills a bowl that sat nearby with water before tossing it into the small fire. To their luck, the flames out almost immediately.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Still a bad cook I see,” Paul says jokingly.

“Sod off Macca. My cooking has gotten a lot better.”

“Says the guy that almost burned down his home,” Paul adds, causing them both to fall out with laughter.

Paul takes over the cooking from there and only has John do the minor things like passing him the salt or dicing onions. John doesn’t mind though. He’s just happy to see Paul laughing and talking like the old days. He would give anything to keep things this way.

* * *

 

“Alright, I’ll be there … thanks….bye.” John sighs and hangs up the phone before turning to Paul with sunken shoulders.

“Work?”

“Yeah,”

“I thought you had the day off,”

“I did but they want me to come in for some bloody impromptu meeting.”

“Oh…”

“I’m sorry, Paulie.”

“No, it’s fine. I should be getting home anyway.” Paul smiles weakly.

“You can stay here. I’ll only be gone for a couple hours.”

“John, I would love to but I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“It’s getting late and Pete will be home anytime soon.”

“Are you sure ?”

Paul nods and John sighs inwardly.

***

When John pulls into the parking lot of the tall and all too familiar building Paul takes a deep breath.

“Again, I’m really sorry for having to leave so soon,” John says.

“No need to apologize. Really.”

“I’ll come back tomorrow around one.”

Paul nods and whispers a goodbye before opening the car door. Just as he is about to step out John grabs his hand and draws him back in. He gives the other man a confused look and opens his mouth to say something but is cut off by John crashing their lips together. Paul kisses him back for a brief moment but pulls away soon after.

“I… I have to go,” he whispers.

“I’m sorry, Macca. I shouldn’t have.”

“It’s ok. I mean... it’s just… bye, John.” Paul says before rushing out the car.

John buries his face in the palm of his hands and sighs deeply. He hopes he didn’t just mess things up between them.

* * *

 

Paul is sitting at the table eating dinner while Pete babbles on. It’s rare that Pete ever talks to him and tells him about his day. But whenever he does it usually meant that he was in a good mood. Today is one of those days. Paul doesn’t say much. He just listens and nods or sticks in a few words when needed.The kiss still weighs heavily on his mind. He begins to wonder what his life would have been like if he had never met Pete or what his life could have been if John had chosen him years ago.

“Are you even listening to me?” Pete snaps.

“Yes, I am,” Paul replies with a forced smile.

“Then tell me what I was just talking about,”

“You...umm… I’m sorry, I don’t remember”

Pete flashes him a destroying look. “What is the matter with you? You’ve been spacing out ever since I came home. Is there something you’re not telling me ?”

“N-no,”

Pete reverts to talking and Paul zones out once again. The only thing on his mind is John.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, darlings ! First of all, I am really sorry for not posting last weekend. I was beyond busy. I hope you all can forgive me ! ❤❤❤

* * *

 

When Paul walks through the door he is greeted by a slap that almost sends him flying to the floor. He whimpers in pain and brings his hand to his red hot cheek.

“Hand me the keys !” Pete demands.

With shaking fingers Paul hands the keys over, making sure he never looks up to meet the other man’s angry eyes. He really fucked up this time. He shouldn’t have gone to John’s place today. Pete’s going to kill him, he just knows it.

“You didn’t think I would find out about your little meetings with John, right ?”

“I-I’m sorry,” Paul cries.

“You’re always fucking sorry !”

Paul knees buckle with fear as tears of regret trickle down his face. “ I wouldn’t do it again, I promise,” he says with a trembling voice.

“Shut up !”

“Sorry…”

“I said shut it !”

Paul flinches at the harsh tone in the other man’s voice and absentmindedly whispers another apology. Pete clenches his teeth and grips tighter onto the belt he held in his hand before striking the younger.

“John doesn’t care about you. All he wants to do is to fuck you like the dirty slut you are!”

Paul bites his tongue and cries silently.

“You're a dead man, McCartney !"

***

Paul jumps out of his sleep, drenched in sweat and his heart pounding through his chest. He looks around with confusion and is relieved when he realizes that he was in the comforts of his bed. He tries to calm himself down and accept the fact that it was just a dream but it doesn’t work. With a sigh, he wills himself out of bed and heads to the kitchen for a glass of water.

He rests his weight on the table and looks up at the clock that reads 3 a.m. Pete still hasn’t returned. Maybe two years ago Paul would have been worried but not anymore. He doesn’t bother questioning him about where he’s been or who he’s been out with. He stopped asking questions a long time ago. He just settles for the thought that Pete was probably out with friends; at least that is what he wants to believe.

The sudden knock on the door startles him for a moment. He warily approaches it and looks through the peephole where Pete and his brother, Rory, stood. Quickly he opens the door and sighs inwardly when he sees Pete hanging onto his brother’s shoulder to keep his balance. He’s drunk again.

“Hi, Paulie!” Pete slurs  “Did you miss me ?”

“I tried convincing him to leave the pub earlier but you know how stubborn he is,”

Paul shakes his head and flashes a thin smile. “Thanks for bringing him home safe, Rory.”

“Yeah Rory, t-thanks for b-bringing me home.” Pete stutters “You’re my guardian angel. Do you know that?”

Rory gives his brother a pitiful look and lightly taps his shoulder “Make sure you get some rest, ok?”

Pete nods and incoherently mumbles something before stumbling off.

“How are things with you guys?” Rory asks after Pete disappears into the kitchen.

“Everything’s fine,”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah…”

“Look, Pete’s my brother and I love him but I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I don’t get this off my chest.” Rory begins “Pete’s heading down a road of destruction and if you stick around he’s going to drag you along with him.”

Paul stays silent and waits for Rory to finish. 

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that you need to leave before it's too late.”

“Ro-”

“You’re still young. You have your whole life ahead of you. I wouldn’t be telling you this if I didn’t care.”

Paul is about to say something but swallows his words when Pete returns. “What’re you two talking about ?”

“We were just catching up.” Rory answers, “We haven’t seen each other in a while, you know?”

Paul nods in agreement under Pete’s watchful eyes.

“Well, I better get going. Cheerio !” Rory says before taking off.

Pete slams the door shut and turns to Paul with a murderous look “Didn’t I tell you not to talk to anyone when I’m not around?” he barks.

Paul winces, already anticipating a slap. “ I’m sorry.”

“What did he ask you?”

“H-he just wanted to know how I was doing,”

“Is that all?”

“Yes,”

“I suppose you told him that you were fine, right?” Pete questions, tracing his finger over the younger’s jawline.

Paul nods and tries best to hide his nervousness.

“Good. Now, go to the bedroom, strip and wait for me.”

"No,"

"What did you say to me ?!" Pete hisses.

“...I’m not in the mood,"

The words leave Paul’s lips so fast that he doesn’t get enough time to think about the repercussions of them. No one says  _no_  to Pete and especially not him.

“I don’t care if you’re in the mood or not. You’re going to do as I say. Now, go !”  

When Paul doesn’t move Pete’s eyes darken almost immediately. He takes a swing at him but misses when the younger man dodges. He makes multiple attempts to get a hold of him but continuously fails. With a drunken rage, he storms out the room and into the kitchen.

By the time Paul could catch his breath Pete comes back into the living room with something in his hand. It’s hard for Paul to tell exactly what it is that the other man was holding given how dim the light is. As he draws closer and closer the object begins to shimmer. It isn’t until they’re face-to-face that Paul recognizes  the shimmering object as a knife. He quickly runs to the  door and tries to open it but stops when he feels a sharp and throbbing pain run through his right arm. He doesn’t realize that he had been stabbed until he sees the blood spreading over the sleeve of his shirt. He yelps in pain and pleads with the other man to stop but his words fall on deaf ears.

Pete mercilessly attacks the younger man for several agonizing minutes and doesn’t stop until he collapses to the floor. He kicks him a little to see if he moves but when he doesn’t he tosses the bloody knife to the floor and then heads to the bathroom for a shower.

* * *

 

John is in a deep sleep when he is awoken by a sudden knock on the door. He curses under his breath and gets out of bed before slipping on his glasses and rushing downstairs;prepared to give whoever it was a piece of his mind.

He yanks open the door and is about to yell something but stops when he sees Paul standing before him, his shirt soaked with blood.

“Macca ! What happened?!”

“P-Pete…” Paul murmurs.

John inhales deeply and closes his eyes for a second. “Wait here. I’ll go get my car keys,” he says before running off.

Paul leans in the doorway for support as his knees begin to go weak. Thankfully John comes back not too long after and helps him to his car.

*********

John paces the white tiled floor of the waiting room with his arms crossed and his face filled with worry. He’s been waiting for hours without any word on Paul’s condition. The more he waited the more frustrated he became.

“Excuse me,” he calls to a nurse passing by.

“Yes?”

“My friend… I need to know if he’s ok.”

“What’s your friend’s name?”

“Paul, Paul McCartney.”

“Oh, yes.” The woman says looking down at her clipboard. “Well, he lost a lot of blood but he’s expected to be ok.”

“Can I see him?”

“Sure,”

The redhead leads John down a long corridor and to a small room. When he enters the room, Paul’s eyes are red and puffy as if he had been crying but he still manages to give a smile.

“How’re you feeling ?” John asks, scooting to the younger’s bedside.

“I’m alright.” Paul whispers “Just a little tired,”

“What happened ?"

Paul begins to tell him the story and just from the way he spoke it John could tell that he was embarrassed by the entire situation. John tries to stay calm but deep down inside his blood is boiling with anger towards Pete.

********

It’s almost midday and Paul is fast asleep. John is still by his side and hasn’t moved since he first came into the room. He gently caresses the younger man’s hair and watches him as he sleeps peacefully.

“I’m never letting you out of my site again.” he promises.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry in advance for any typos. I will correct them later.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,darlings ! Did you miss me ?... No ? …. Ok *crawls back into cave* . I am truly sorry for not posting in over a month. I had major writer's block. Anyway, I’m back now ! As you may have noticed this is going to be the last chapter. This chapter was originally supposed to be two chapters but after making you guys wait for so long I didn’t want to drag this story out for another week.That being said, this chapter is a bit lengthy. I would like to thank you all for reading the last 8 chapters and for your kudos and encouraging comments. I would not have gone on with this story if it weren’t for you guys.
> 
> @Rioviolina I kept my promise this time ! :D
> 
> Before I go I just wanted to share this really cute video I found of John being super concerned about Paul ---https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYzSbRYFaPQ

 

* * *

 

_John had never really considered himself a jealous guy up until the night of George’s birthday party. Everything had been going fine until Paul arrived with a mysterious blond hair lad. John takes a drag from his cigarette and watches as the guy whispers something in Paul’s ear, making him giggle. John has the strongest urge to storm through the crowd of teenagers and snap the blond’s neck. He isn’t sure why he feels this way; after all, he and Paul were nothing more than friends._

_“Great party, isn’t it ?”  A familiar voice suddenly asks._

_John turns to look at his friend, Colin, for a brief moment. “Yeah, ”_

_“Remember that bird I was telling you about the other day?”_

_“Yeah,” John replies, watching on as the blond brushes a hand over Paul’s shoulder._

_“Do you think I should ask her out?”_

_“Do whatever makes you happy, son…”_

_Colin nods and goes on to ramble about something else but John doesn’t pay much attention to him.He’s too busy eyeing the giggling couple from across the room._

_“Jealous, Lennon?” Colin questions, looking into the direction his friend stared._

_John breaks his gaze and turns to look at the older boy before chuckling nervously. “ Jealous? Why would I be jealous?”_

_“Don’t play dumb, John. I’ve seen the way you look at Paul. You practically drool over the guy. You’ve got the hots for him, don’t  ya?”_

_“What?” John questions in an embarrassingly high-pitched voice while simultaneously loosening his collar._

_All of a sudden the room starts to get a little too hot for John’s liking. “ I’m not queer,” he continues._

_Colin snickers and pats John’s back “Denial is a terrible thing.” he says before walking away._

_John knits his eyebrows as a million questions run through his mind. What did Colin mean by denial? Does that mean he’s queer? Is he in love with his best friend? Is it that obvious to everyone? Has he been lying to himself all these years? Fuck ! John runs his fingers through his hair in frustration before heading for the front door. He can’t stand to look at Paul anymore or be in the same room as him. He needs some time to think._

_He’s about to make his escape when…_

_“John !” Paul calls, pushing his way through the crowded room._

_John sighs inwardly as Paul approaches. Maybe he should just walk through the door and pretend he didn’t hear him. No ! that would be cowardly.  Damn it. What would he  say to him? He isn’t even sure he could look Paul in the eyes without making an idiot of himself._

_“Are you leaving already ?” Paul asks._

_“Yeah, umm… Mimi wants me home before twelve,”_

_“Oh,” Paul smiles sadly. “Let me walk you home then,”_

_“No !” John yells, making Paul and a few others in earshot startled . “I mean… no. I’m fine by myself. Thanks.”_

_The last thing he needs is to spend any more time with the person responsible for his mixed feelings._

_Paul squints his eyes trying to figure out the other boy.  “John, are you ok?”_

_“I’m fine. Couldn’t have been better !”_

_“...Ok”_

_“Tell George I said ‘bye’ .”_

_“I will,”_

_John smiles and exchanges an awkward goodbye with Paul before heading into the cold and lonely streets of the night. He had never been more confused in all his life._

* * *

 

John shifts uneasily in his seat as he watches Paul struggle to put his shirt on over his injured arm. After a very stressful two weeks, the hospital has finally decided to discharge Paul today. Having to shuffle between work and countless hospital visits for the last couple weeks was not an easy task as far as John was concerned. He honestly didn’t know how he managed to do them both without collapsing from exhaustion.

“Are you sure you don’t need any help?”

“For the last time, I’m fine,” Paul spat.

John sighs and sits back in his chair trying to control the anger that is slowly beginning  to take over him.

“Jesus, Paul, why do you have to be so bloody stubborn ?!” John thinks out loud.

“I don’t want your help, John. God, do you not think I’m not capable of doing things on my own?”

“Paul that’s not --”

“That’s it, isn’t it? You think I’m weak, don’t you?”

John frowns at the younger man’s bizarre questions.

“I’m not weak, alright?!”

“I never said you were,”

“Well, you sure treat me like I am. I’m sick of it !”

The small hospital room falls silent for a few minutes. “Paul, I know how you feel --”

“No, you don’t, John. You don’t know how I feel and you never will. You don’t know how many times I’ve cried myself to sleep. You don’t know what I go through every day when I think about the last three years of my pathetic life and you sure as hell don’t know how many times I prayed that I would go to sleep one night and never wake up again !” Paul exclaims, on the verge of tears.

For the first time in his life, John is speechless. He opens his mouth to say something but closes it again, afraid of saying the wrong thing. He instead gets up and wraps the other man into a warm hug. Paul is skeptical at first but eventually hugs him back and rests his forehead on John’s shoulder, allowing his tears to fall.

“I’m sorry.”Paul murmurs after a long pause. “I didn’t mean to take my anger out on you. I - I just…”

 “S’alright, Macca,” John says, gently brushing the younger’s hair.

John can’t remember the last time he saw Paul show  this much emotion. He wishes they could stay like this forever while the rest of the world disappears. When Paul breaks their embrace, John sighs inwardly.

“I’m just angry with myself” Paul admits.“Why couldn’t I just find the strength to leave him, Johnny?” he asks, teary-eyed.

“Because you loved him and because you thought he loved you,”

Paul takes a deep breath and looks down to the tiled floor. “Thanks for everything, John. I really appreciate all you’ve been doing,”

“You would have done the same for me.” John answers.

Paul looks up and smiles at him gratefully.

“We  better leave before the nurses kick us out,” John jokes, making them both laugh.

                                                             

* * *

 

Paul steps onto the veranda and looks up into the night sky while simultaneously pulling his robe closer as a bone chilling gust of wind blows his way. He hasn’t been able to get much sleep at all. He spent most of the night tossing and turning as a million thoughts ran through his head. He sighs with frustration and takes a drag from his cigarette. The street is quiet and almost completely dark if it weren’t for the two flickering street lights. Paul braces himself on the railing and looks around the empty street, enjoying the peace and quiet. When his eyes land on a slender figure standing under a nearby tree his blood freezes.He blinks a few times, hoping his mind was playing tricks on him. But when blinking doesn’t change anything Paul begins to stare.The more he stares the closer it gets. The hairs on the back of his neck stand with fear when the mysterious figure steps into the light.

“Pete…” he murmurs to himself in disbelief.

The other man looks up at him with a sinister grin playing across his face. Paul feels his knees go weak. This can’t be happening. He must be dreaming. How could Pete possibly know where he was?

_“Wherever you go, I will find you.”_

Paul trembled with horror as he remembers Pete’s haunting words. He watches as the grin on Pete’s face is wiped away and replaced with a stoic expression. Overtaken with fear, he backs into the glass door.

When Pete bursts into maniacal laughter  Paul dashes back into the living room screaming out John’s name.

Half sleepy,  John stumbles out his bedroom to a very frantic Paul.  “What’s the matter?”

Instead of answering the question, the younger man grabs him by the wrist and forces him onto the veranda.  John looks around the empty street with confusion before stepping back into the living room where Paul paced back and forth.

“Did you see him?!” he asks with wide eyes.

“There is no one out there,”

“Pete was there, I swear !”

“Pa --”

“He was there! It wasn’t my imagination. He was there...” Paul assures “You’ve got to believe me, Johnny. I’m not crazy,”

Honestly, John doesn’t know what to believe. All he knows is that Paul seems to be pretty convinced that what he saw was real.

“I can’t escape him...” Paul mumbles “He isn’t going to stop until he gets me.”

 John takes in a sharp breath and rubs comforting patterns on the younger’s back. 

They both end up not getting any sleep that night.

                                                                

* * *

 

Paul looks around the crowded karaoke bar and smiles when he remembers how John and George practically dragged him out the house to _“have some fun”_. They were probably right. After all, he couldn’t spend the rest of his days cooped up in bed and besides, it has been weeks since he had last seen any sign of Pete.

George comes back to the table they were all sitting with a huge grin on his face. “I just signed us up to sing _Johnny B. Goode !_ ”

“You did what?!” Paul exclaims over the loud music.

“I said I just sign --”

“We know what you said, George,” John interrupts “Why?”

 “Come on guys! we’re here to have fun, remember?” George smiles “ They have guitars too. It’ll be great !”

“I haven’t played the guitar in almost four years. I’m absolute shite !”

“Paul, will you relax? I can assure you that almost all the people here are amateurs. They wouldn’t know if you or any of us mess up.”

Paul glares at the younger man then looks to John for back- up.

“I think he’s right, Macca. For old time sake, what do you say?”

Paul is about to say something but stops when the host suddenly steps on stage and introduces them to the audience. Paul feels a lump in his throat when he makes his way to the small stage. All eyes were on them. God, he can’t afford to mess this up. He nervously slings the guitar over his shoulder and begins to tune it.

By the time they start playing the lump in his throat goes away. He goes back to the days when the three of them sat in Mimi’s living room goofing around on their guitars and singing to the top of their lungs. It’s a memory he still holds dear.

Paul breathes a sigh of relief when he looks into the crowd and sees a few people singing along and even dancing.  Maybe he wasn’t so bad after all.

 

 *****

“We’re heading over to the bar, wanna come?” John asks.

“I think, I’ll be fine here,” Paul smiles, relaxing in his seat.

“You sure? The drinks are on me,” George pitches in.

“I’m the designated driver, remember?”

John chuckles and pats the younger man’s shoulder. “ You’ve always been the responsible one, Macca,” he says before disappearing into the crowd with George.

Paul takes a sip of his drink and turns his attention back to the woman on stage singing a very bad version of Elvis Presley’s Hound Dog. He is so absorbed in the woman’s performance that he doesn’t even realize that someone had crept up behind him until he hears the all too familiar voice.

“Hello, love.”

Paul jumps and turns around. His blood runs cold when he looks and sees Pete standing over him with a crazy look in his eyes. Paul trembles with fear when the other man grabs him by the arm and pulls him to his feet.

“You’re coming with me,” Pete hisses.

Paul’s heart is beating through his chest. He looks around the crowded room trying to find John and George and Pete laughs.

“They aren’t going to save you, darling,” Pete smirks, pulling tighter at the younger man’s arm. “Don’t try  anything stupid.”

Just like that Paul understands it’s over.  He doesn’t protest when Pete drags him out the bar and throws him into his car.  He knew this day would come sooner or later. It was all just a matter of time. He looks out the window feeling defeated.

“How far did you think you could get?” Pete asks, starting the car.  “By the time I’m done with you, you wouldn’t even know your name.”

Paul bites his tongue as he tries to fight the tears that were beginning to form in his eyes.

“Don’t even worry about your knight in shining armors; I’ll deal with him as soon as I’m finished with you.”

“Leave John out of this !”

Pete stops the car and back-hands the younger man so hard that his nose starts bleeding. “Don’t ever raise your voice at me again. Understand?”

Paul nods and holds his burning cheek.

“Do you need to be taught your place again?” Pete scoffs, yanking at the younger’s hair.

“N-no,”

The older man shoves him aside and starts the car again. Paul leans his head on the window and begins to cry silently.

“You’ll be crying bloody tears when I’m done with you.” Pete says a few minutes into their drive.

Paul watches on with horror as the other man speeds through traffic lights. His eyes are set on the road ahead but Paul could tell that the man’s mind was somewhere else. The sounds of other drivers honking their horns with anger when Pete cuts them off rings out like an alarm in Paul’s ears.

The next thing Paul remembers is a flashing white light and their car swerving into a tree. Everything after that goes black.

*****

Paul is surprised to open his eyes and see John and George staring back at him along with a crowd of other people. He tries to stand up but stops when he feels a shooting pain in his knee.

“How’d you find me?”

“George saw Pete leaving the bar with you so we followed him,”

“We tried to catch the bastard before he stormed off with you but the room was so bloody crowded that we didn’t get to reach you in time,” George adds.

“Pete…” Paul whispers to himself “Where is he?”

John takes a deep breath and presses his lips together. “He’s dead, Macca.”

John continues to speak but Paul stops hearing him. He looks beyond the crowd of people and sees two police officers taking notes with  Pete’s bloodied and lifeless body laying at their feet. Paul really isn’t sure how to feel. A part of him remembers the few happy times he and Pete shared but the other part of him also remembers all the bad times.

Despite his mixed emotions Paul, however, feels a renewed sense of freedom. It’s something he hasn’t felt in almost four years.

He feels a weight lifted off his shoulders when the reality that he was finally free of Pete began to settle in.

                                                          

* * *

 

George presses the doorbell to John’s home with an almost permanent smile on  his face. He’s been on a business trip a few months now and hasn’t seen Paul or John since. Well, he’s spoken to John a few times on the phone but it’s not the same as actually seeing him. When he presses the buzzer again and gets no answer, he decides to look under the doormat for a spare key. And just as he had expected there is indeed a spare key sitting comfortably under the mat.

“Very clever, Lennon.” George says, turning the doorknob.

The house is rather quiet when he steps in. Almost too quiet. “John...Paul?!”

The response to his call is only met by more silence. “Maybe they're not home” he tells himself.  He sighs and heads back to the door but stops in his tracks when he hears  giggling coming from upstairs.

He quickly turns around and follows the sound. The closer he gets the louder the sounds become and George could swear he starts to hear… moaning?

It doesn’t take long for him to realise that the sounds were coming from John’s bedroom. When George approaches the room his eyes almost fall out their socket when he sees a half naked Paul sitting on a half naked John’s lap. Paul moans and throws his head back in ecstasy  when John begins to suck on his neck. Those horny fuckers.

George swings the ajar door open and clears his throat with crossed arms. Paul quickly  jumps off John and quickly hides himself under the covers. George almost laughs out loud when he sees how pink the both of them became.

“What the bloody hell, George !” John scoffs.

“Hey, is that anyway to greet a friend you haven’t seen in months?” George teases.

“Yeah, well, I was kind of in the middle of something !”

“I could tell,” George says, leaning in the doorway. “So, how long has this been going on?”

“Why do you care?”

“Because you two are my best mates. I think I deserve some answers,”

“Sod off, Harrison !” John snaps.

“We’ve only been having -- we’ve only been together for a month.” Paul answers,still not making much eye contact.

George’s jaw drops. “Why didn’t you tell me ?”

“Because you never asked !” John barks before jumping to his feet “Now if you’ll excuse me, I would like to finish off what I’ve started.” he smiles before closing the door in George’s face.

“Wait ! I have so many questions !”

“Go.Away.George !” John shouts.

George shakes his head and chuckles. After everything that has happened over the past few months George is just happy those two found each other again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for any typos.I'll correct them later. Thanks again for reading ! ❤❤❤


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